Posts

I miss my old self

 It has been a long time since my last post. Things must be very bad for me huh? To suddenly return here. To be honest I am just trying to know me better, have I changed? or Im just the same old me. and truthfully I think I didn't change at all. Same ol' writing style, same ol' stories, same ol' emotions.  Im turning 30. Age is just a number (no, it's a word) and Im still feeling quite young. But deep down I wish I had a son or a daughter already. Please save me. Things are great, really. But I cant help myself from thinking that the only thing missing from my life is having my own kid. I cant imagine how great life would be with them.  Future me, don't be freaked out when you read this whenever in the future. Your life right now is not that bad.  and surely you're not stressing about having kids. You just wish you are not on a long distanced relationship. Thats all. and you know why you wanted that. L

Journey

Looking past my five semesters as a postgraduate student, I could say that time surely fly in a rocket. It was not until recently I realised I have spent almost three years writing a thesis that just started to look like a completed thesis. I admit that I wasted so much time doing anything but writing it. Even right now I could have written one or two paragraphs on the second research question yet here I am writing some post on my blog. But trust me, this is for research purpose. I noticed these days, my writing has worsened. It is incoherent, not making senses and I tend to jump from an idea to another idea without good connecting sentence. You could say, it is almost identical to the video of the guy admitting that he is the one in that video and urged SPRM to investigate the minister for corruption. It is that bad, trust me. and it is this post purpose to help me practice with my writing. I would be lying if I said that I never regretted my choice continuing Master Research, I hon

REGRET

Suddenly it hits me. No, I lied. It's not a sudden momentum that hits me. I'm well aware that it was a slow and steady force that builds up, getting bigger each day, carrying a little heaviness in each pace. But because it's a steady and slow momentum, I just let it passed through me, every day. Little did I care. But little did I know, the force jumbled up together hitting me almost in every direction with the impact that I couldn't cope. I'm never prepared. The force tore up my wall, breaking my weak defence, and I died when my heart collided with the force. And it's too late now to summon the never-existing army that I should have trained in the past moon. Even though it's too late now, the only thing I can do is to rise from ashes.

Loan Words

Debate against the purity of a language is not new and unique to only Bahasa Malaysia. The English language had undergone this sensational debate long time ago when the borrowing of words from Greek, Latin and French were at the utmost in the period of 1530 to 1660. Other languages such as German, Turkish, and French were also debated and said to be corrupted due to loaning words from other languages. As early as the age of middle English, Purist has been rejecting words borrowing as they believe this act contaminate the English language with inkhorn term (Sheard, 1970) as cited in (Ojeda & Cecelia, 2004). However, we should keep in mind that language change is inevitable when a language stop changing, it will be a dead language. Classical Latin is already a dead language for being static for nearly two thousand years. World changes as the technology develop. New inventions emerged, new words created and being users of the products, words are loaned. There goes the reason for loan

realization

I always said that I'll enjoy the moment while it still last. I even prepared myself for the heartbreaks that'll follow. I've seen it coming. and I thought I'm prepared. now when the heart shattered i could do nothing .not even crying

#random1

I enjoy good stories. heartbreaking stories. tear-inducing stories. any stories that I can relate with. these kind of stories lit my heart. sometimes help me in decision making.  or make me forget the sadness that build up in my heart. or the clots of thoughts that are wandering in my mind. I love stories whether they are written, drawn,acted or told. I'm wishing for a story that will give me some light, an escape, a solution for my heartbreak. .... 1201am 6/2/16

A weird dream

I've got a really really weird dream this evening. I dreamt about my literature lecturer, baby hippopotamus, old bus driver, hotel receptionist, primary school acquaintances and some of my current friends. Well the dream started with me helping my friend doing her translation assignments. She asked me to translate something archaic-like religious sentence.  There's one word that I couldn't figure out the meaning. Tashwi or sth like that. I didn't even know what is the meaning of the word , so I left it out untranslated. Well, I didn't know, how I'm moving to the second part of my dream where I'm trying to find a lavatory so I can change my uniform. I didn't know why I need to change into my taekwondo's. It doesn't really makes sense. I went to L4 block and the lavatories were so disgusting. Like really disgusting, it doesn't even looks like a toilet. More like a garage, a barn. Very gloomy, and there's greenish dark blue oil-like water.